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lyrics

The irony is, my last boyfriend and I:
We both adored pussy.
I mean cats.
Get your minds out of the gutter!
But he was bad with money,
didn’t get Kenneth Anger
and never heard of Proust.
Classic twink, to use le mot juste.
Why are we discussing ancient Mesopotamian history?
I’m vamping.

I’ve been ground through the gears of Grindr.
Got an irritating rash from Scruff.
Called 911 on Bear411,
and basically, boys, men, and other, had enough.

Now I’m here.
See how low I’ve fallen?
A site for…relationships.
Isn’t that just the sexiest word?
Relationships.
What could be sexier?
“Spreadsheet” is sexier.
“Compost” is sexier.
“Tupperware” is sexier.
I know; I’m vamping.

Isn’t everybody gay now?
I was told that everyone, by now, would be gay.
That’s the Agenda, right?
It’s 2020, people!
Twenty. Twenty. A same-sex year.
Still vamping.
That’s me: Romantic Vamp.
The same two chords to fill time,
to pretend I’m fine, don’t ask if I’m
fine, of course I’m fine. I’m alone.
Just me and the cat and the cat’s not sure
this relationship is going anywhere.
That pussy has ceased to care.
The cat’s vamping.

He’s called Beardsley, by the way.
After the late Victorian illustrator who died tragically young? No?
BUH-bye.

By the way, for all you straight-acting conservative Daddies
who think I’m too-too…
I’m a paramedic and who works the graveyard shift.
So before you respond, remember:
I responded first.
Suck on that.
Still, still, still, still, still vamping.

What comes after the vamping?
When does the song begin?
The repetition is cute, then it bores.
Its circular motion resembles an ocean,
but then you can’t swim any more.
You wait for your rescue ship
and wonder: Has that ship sailed or no?

credits

from In Real Life, released July 8, 2022

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American Modern Recordings New York, New York

American Modern Recordings (AMR) specializes in recordings of contemporary classical music, with an emphasis on music by living American composers. AMR is also the house label for the American Modern Ensemble (AME) and its affiliated ensembles. Our albums are critically-acclaimed and top-sellers on Amazon, CDBaby, iTunes, and everywhere recordings are sold. ... more

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